Sunday, October 30, 2011
Transition
So for the past four years or so, I've been a dirty homeless traveler kid, and now I am attempting to live inside of a house/pay rent/pay taxes. This transition is a difficult one for me and I am often toying with the idea of hitting the road again. Although I love the folk I live with, the idea of living inside, at all, is a little troubling during this time, due to the revolutionary times, and I'm sure many other reasons.
To me, being homeless/living outside was freedom, I felt as though is some way I had moved myself outside of the system and was working only within my own limitations. Now that I live inside, even though I live in the coolest house in LaCrosse, I feel unaccomplished, hypocritical, hindered, bound, and the "itch" to travel. I remember, many times while "on the road" thinking 'how could anyone whose ever tramped go back to a box?' And now here I am attempting a life I've never really made sense for myself of.
I've chosen to do this because I felt as though, if I were to ever settle, I would need to be able to sit/ground myself...
One day(soon) I will answer to the call of the road once again. But for now I will enjoy my time here with my family at the Coop house.
To me, being homeless/living outside was freedom, I felt as though is some way I had moved myself outside of the system and was working only within my own limitations. Now that I live inside, even though I live in the coolest house in LaCrosse, I feel unaccomplished, hypocritical, hindered, bound, and the "itch" to travel. I remember, many times while "on the road" thinking 'how could anyone whose ever tramped go back to a box?' And now here I am attempting a life I've never really made sense for myself of.
I've chosen to do this because I felt as though, if I were to ever settle, I would need to be able to sit/ground myself...
One day(soon) I will answer to the call of the road once again. But for now I will enjoy my time here with my family at the Coop house.
Notes from my past
My Love
by Jay Grays on Sunday, January 14, 2007 at 8:52am
Which do you trust your head or your heart? Well, first you must realize and understand where your head is at and where your heart is at. If they aren't in the right place then certain actions and views are polluted. So my questions to America are, where is your head and where is your heart?
My heart is in a place of love. It knows to be open and concerned for my fellow man and for myself. Open to love, wishes, opinions, and dreams. Concerned for the well-being of all of mankind. My heart believes in a place where there are no borders or boundaries, no signs that say "KEEP OUT" and not a person that will possess something without the nature to share. I have a heart that sees only peace and love as a means of life.
My head is a place of peace. It wants to know nothing of war and nothing of vengeance. Unfortunately we live in a world where war and vengeance is seen almost as a necessity. I believe that without the separation this world allows peace is possible. And by this I mean, without borders, without countries. This is the World and we are all human, why do we separate ourselves. Mankind living all as one could create peace. There would be conflict, but there is nothing wrong with conflict. When there are problems between people, such problems should be solved on a small scale. One should not get an "army" to fight ones "battles." My head believes in only peace and love as a means of life.
The only way your head or your heart can be in the right place is if the both believe in a little thing called love. Love is the ingredient to life. The topic of 9/11 was mentioned in the text that informed me about writing this. What happened was tragic indeed, but getting back at them is not the answer. As children growing up in America, we are taught in school, that it is not right to be vengeful, and now as an adult it seems like it's okay. Well I don't think it is, and I don't understand why one of the first things our president said after the tragedy was that America was going to fight back.
So trust your heart or trust your head, but please know what and why your putting your trust in. If you don't then you may be heading down the wrong path. Believe in what you dream, dream of peace, and peace may be with you.
I constantly wonder about the fate of mankind. What will happen to my family and to my friends? We all must die one day, and I am constantly reminded of this everyday. So what will we do? Will we march onward for peace, or wage more war?
War is a means of the end. War is not good for anything, war is death and destruction, war is fear in the eyes of the innocent. Wake up and smell the bloodshed. See red in the eyes of the lost. War is for power and power is greed. See past the greed, envy, and the hate. See what is happening because of vengance. As of January 3rd, 2007 3,013 U.S troops have died for vengence, and 22,714 wounded. Of the parished, 98% male. 90% non-officers; 78% active duty, 13% National Guard; 16% killed by non-hostile causes. 53% of US casualties were under 25 years old. 68% were from the US Army. There were 251 non-US troop casualties. Of the wounded, 20% are serious brain or spinal injuries. A UN issued report dated Sept 20, 2006 stating that Iraqi civilian casualities have been significantly under-reported. Casualties are reported at 50,000 to over 100,000, but may be much higher. Some informed estimates place Iraqi civilian casualities at over 600,000. People are dying for what?
The time for peace is now. I've been asking everyone, "Is peace possible?" At this point, it better be. Now is the time people. Become one with one another. Unite and bring peace. Have love in your hearts and peace in your mind.
Forget about America, or any other kind country. Do not have pride in seperation. The borders need to be opened, the government must fall, and peace must rise.
Many way say that there are just too many people with hate in there hearts...too many people with bad intention...too many people that do want peace. NO! Peace is possible! Have faith in goodness. If you are not a believer in God, then put your faith in goodness. There are good people out there. As for the evil...well we must do our best to love the evil, and to understand it. Peace is NOT possible without understanding and love. Try to love all. These "too many" people with hate, bad intentions, and unwanting of peace, will be loved, not hated, not disregarded, not controlled, simply loved. With the right cause and the right intention goodness can prevail.
The time for peace is now. If you have love in your heart and peace on your mind, people will lead, and people will follow. I understand that my views are rather idealistic, and see impossible, but peace can happen with the right intentions. Please, I ask you please...have love for all. Thank you.
Jay Grays
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1) I feel as though I was born to travel
2) I am bisexual open to all experiences
3) I am a very spiritual person in a Pagan sence
4) I love to cook and to eat as well
5) I play a veriety of instuments... mostly strings though like guitar, banjo, Uke, viloin, Mandilin you kno
6) I only have one memory of ever seeing my parents together, and it was because my mom was giving my dad a ride to the store
7) My mother was diagnosed with Huntingtons Disease when I was about 13 years old, and its been a difficult relationship ever since
8) I absolutly love to sleep outside...and thats why I LIVE outside
9) I have no desire to have a girlfriend or a boyfriend...not now in my life
10) I've canoed 100 miles of the Mississippi river in Norther Minnesota
11) I've ridden a freight train from Montana to Minnesota
12) I love the meaning of my full name... Justin = One who upholds balence(justice) Lee= One who lives or plays near the meadow and Grays= dweller of the grove
13) I smoke a whole lot of weed and get free most of the time
14) I do very well at manifesting my own reality
15) I've been to 43 U.S states thoughout my travels
16) I recall past lives
17) I peddled a bicycle 300 miles from San Luis Obispo to Rancho Cucamunga
18) I am closer to my friends than anyone of my family members
19) I've sailed though the Puget Sound from Olympia, WA to Seattle
20) I get paid to hitch-hike and I manage to have a good time being homeless because I have faith which i believe to be the Lack of fear...which makes me a true Warrior
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My heart is in a place of love. It knows to be open and concerned for my fellow man and for myself. Open to love, wishes, opinions, and dreams. Concerned for the well-being of all of mankind. My heart believes in a place where there are no borders or boundaries, no signs that say "KEEP OUT" and not a person that will possess something without the nature to share. I have a heart that sees only peace and love as a means of life.
My head is a place of peace. It wants to know nothing of war and nothing of vengeance. Unfortunately we live in a world where war and vengeance is seen almost as a necessity. I believe that without the separation this world allows peace is possible. And by this I mean, without borders, without countries. This is the World and we are all human, why do we separate ourselves. Mankind living all as one could create peace. There would be conflict, but there is nothing wrong with conflict. When there are problems between people, such problems should be solved on a small scale. One should not get an "army" to fight ones "battles." My head believes in only peace and love as a means of life.
The only way your head or your heart can be in the right place is if the both believe in a little thing called love. Love is the ingredient to life. The topic of 9/11 was mentioned in the text that informed me about writing this. What happened was tragic indeed, but getting back at them is not the answer. As children growing up in America, we are taught in school, that it is not right to be vengeful, and now as an adult it seems like it's okay. Well I don't think it is, and I don't understand why one of the first things our president said after the tragedy was that America was going to fight back.
So trust your heart or trust your head, but please know what and why your putting your trust in. If you don't then you may be heading down the wrong path. Believe in what you dream, dream of peace, and peace may be with you.
I constantly wonder about the fate of mankind. What will happen to my family and to my friends? We all must die one day, and I am constantly reminded of this everyday. So what will we do? Will we march onward for peace, or wage more war?
War is a means of the end. War is not good for anything, war is death and destruction, war is fear in the eyes of the innocent. Wake up and smell the bloodshed. See red in the eyes of the lost. War is for power and power is greed. See past the greed, envy, and the hate. See what is happening because of vengance. As of January 3rd, 2007 3,013 U.S troops have died for vengence, and 22,714 wounded. Of the parished, 98% male. 90% non-officers; 78% active duty, 13% National Guard; 16% killed by non-hostile causes. 53% of US casualties were under 25 years old. 68% were from the US Army. There were 251 non-US troop casualties. Of the wounded, 20% are serious brain or spinal injuries. A UN issued report dated Sept 20, 2006 stating that Iraqi civilian casualities have been significantly under-reported. Casualties are reported at 50,000 to over 100,000, but may be much higher. Some informed estimates place Iraqi civilian casualities at over 600,000. People are dying for what?
The time for peace is now. I've been asking everyone, "Is peace possible?" At this point, it better be. Now is the time people. Become one with one another. Unite and bring peace. Have love in your hearts and peace in your mind.
Forget about America, or any other kind country. Do not have pride in seperation. The borders need to be opened, the government must fall, and peace must rise.
Many way say that there are just too many people with hate in there hearts...too many people with bad intention...too many people that do want peace. NO! Peace is possible! Have faith in goodness. If you are not a believer in God, then put your faith in goodness. There are good people out there. As for the evil...well we must do our best to love the evil, and to understand it. Peace is NOT possible without understanding and love. Try to love all. These "too many" people with hate, bad intentions, and unwanting of peace, will be loved, not hated, not disregarded, not controlled, simply loved. With the right cause and the right intention goodness can prevail.
The time for peace is now. If you have love in your heart and peace on your mind, people will lead, and people will follow. I understand that my views are rather idealistic, and see impossible, but peace can happen with the right intentions. Please, I ask you please...have love for all. Thank you.
Jay Grays
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
20 things about me
by Jay Grays on Tuesday, December 14, 2010 at 11:53pm
1) I feel as though I was born to travel
2) I am bisexual open to all experiences
3) I am a very spiritual person in a Pagan sence
4) I love to cook and to eat as well
5) I play a veriety of instuments... mostly strings though like guitar, banjo, Uke, viloin, Mandilin you kno
6) I only have one memory of ever seeing my parents together, and it was because my mom was giving my dad a ride to the store
7) My mother was diagnosed with Huntingtons Disease when I was about 13 years old, and its been a difficult relationship ever since
8) I absolutly love to sleep outside...and thats why I LIVE outside
9) I have no desire to have a girlfriend or a boyfriend...not now in my life
10) I've canoed 100 miles of the Mississippi river in Norther Minnesota
11) I've ridden a freight train from Montana to Minnesota
12) I love the meaning of my full name... Justin = One who upholds balence(justice) Lee= One who lives or plays near the meadow and Grays= dweller of the grove
13) I smoke a whole lot of weed and get free most of the time
14) I do very well at manifesting my own reality
15) I've been to 43 U.S states thoughout my travels
16) I recall past lives
17) I peddled a bicycle 300 miles from San Luis Obispo to Rancho Cucamunga
18) I am closer to my friends than anyone of my family members
19) I've sailed though the Puget Sound from Olympia, WA to Seattle
20) I get paid to hitch-hike and I manage to have a good time being homeless because I have faith which i believe to be the Lack of fear...which makes me a true Warrior
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Well You Know
by Jay Grays on Tuesday, January 25, 2011 at 3:30pm
My mind right now is racing, now really thinking of anything at all, nothing in particular anyway. So I thought that I would write something...anything. So I think I will write something about myself, to all of you. Me...I am a homeless traveler, some may call me a bum, some may call me a "street kid" and other may call me amazing... I dont know where I'm going really I'm just letting it out, so bare with me please.
I am in a constant state of departure while always arriving, or at least thats how I like to think of it. I started traveling around the country when I was 18...stole my mothers car(I do not recommend stealing personal belongings) drove away in the dead of Wisconsin winter. Time has passed and things are a bit different now...although i do still travel, only now I understand a bit more about how the universe works. I understand that everything that happens to me is a direct result of me. If I get punched in the face by some drunkin asshole, its MY FAULT. Its all about the things we attract to ourselves. If we believe something is possible and believe that it could and probably will happen then it usually does. So I like to say that I dont fight... I dont get into fights, I don't face those situation. I meet amazing people and amazing things happen to me... and they do... all the time.
I don't drink alcohol, if I do its a rare occasion and I never get drunk... I really dont like the way being drunk feels.... I also dont do drugs... I do smoke weed... I'm a pretty good kid overall don't get into much trouble... unless I'm sleeping on private property because I LIVE OUTSIDE!!! My bestfriend is my dog Connor he's the coolest, and pretty much the only one that can keep up with me.
For those of you that dont know what to think about my lifestyle or for those who do think that my lifestyle is dumb or dangerous please rethink... I live one of the most free lives you could possibly imagine. And its far more enjoyable than 4 to 8 years at a University... I think... then again I've never spent too much time at a university... but I have met a lot of student who are just asshole zombies... or just robot zombies... just following the systematic "norm".... go to school... get a job... have kids...
I feel sorry for those who have fell into that... before they ever even got a chance to truly live.... a chance to experience life, to experience freedom.... When we are under our parents supervision... we are attached by some kind of invisible chain that goes away when our parents decide to detach that chain ... school... job.... bills... our own children... are yet more chains we attach ourselves to, and it hinders us from doing what we want to do when we want to do it.
And many have called me selfish.... but dammit this is my life and before I start worrying about other I think I should be able to live freely to do whatever it is that I want to do. Or don't do whatever I dont want to do. I'm 22 years old I think being selfish in some way is OKAY, infact its taught me to truly love myself and to understand myself a bit more. But I must say I tend to be a very considerate person... I alway pick up after myself, and I am very careful and try to notice if I'm getting on someones nerves... I know when I'm not welcome anymore... at that time I leave... Oh and I have had many jobs while on the road... so doesnt really make sence to tell me to get a job...cause its not gonna be the same as most peoples pointless jobs... I usually work for free because it feels so great to help someone...
I really dont know where I'm going with this, but you know I'm just rambling and thank you if your reading this it means a lot to me. And I am very interested in what everyone thinks, especially old friends that I havn't heard from in a long time.... I have 383 friends here on facebook and I dont keep in touch with nearly enough... infact there are only about 10 to 20 that I can keep up with. I dont know but this is going out to everyone... I LOVE YOU
if there are any questions about anything... my travels.. or my dog... or anything... anything at all... the universe... I will do my best to answer...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Well I realize that my last note may have offended some people. Believe me that was not my intention. I'm writing this note just to mention a few things to a few people.
My family has been the people I interact with every day, so I often tend to consider the stranger walking by me on the street, as my brother/sister. I once asked a family member if he would ever pick up a hitch hiker, and he said "no way." I was very disappointed in his answer, because you see, I have spent a lot of time out hitch hiking and it really gets to you when all day all everyone does is pass you up without even looking at you, like your not even there. It's my understanding (from experience) that hitch hiking and picking up hitch hikers is an okay thing to do, its not any more dangerous than stepping out your front door, hell its much safer than locking yourself in.
Many may only consider blood relation to be family. And that over anyone or anything else "blood" comes first. Well I'll tell you something we all bleed red, and anyone who bleeds is my family.
Many people would like to help others, and that is an amazing attribute, truly human. But I think we must understand that when we put out that vibe, that i am a helping person, we cannot choose who we help. Those people are just put in front of us and we must act. Sometimes your in a position where helping out is simple and outlined, but other times we have to feel it out. There were a lot of cases where I thought I was helping and in turn they had helped me. There are no coincidences in life, everything happens for a reason, and often hitch hikers have some worldly sense and knowledge that someone who lives inside most of the time rarely contains.
Open your heart and let go of fear and doubt, you create the world around you, you've built your dreams and now live them, i love you. Understand the nature of truth.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I am in a constant state of departure while always arriving, or at least thats how I like to think of it. I started traveling around the country when I was 18...stole my mothers car(I do not recommend stealing personal belongings) drove away in the dead of Wisconsin winter. Time has passed and things are a bit different now...although i do still travel, only now I understand a bit more about how the universe works. I understand that everything that happens to me is a direct result of me. If I get punched in the face by some drunkin asshole, its MY FAULT. Its all about the things we attract to ourselves. If we believe something is possible and believe that it could and probably will happen then it usually does. So I like to say that I dont fight... I dont get into fights, I don't face those situation. I meet amazing people and amazing things happen to me... and they do... all the time.
I don't drink alcohol, if I do its a rare occasion and I never get drunk... I really dont like the way being drunk feels.... I also dont do drugs... I do smoke weed... I'm a pretty good kid overall don't get into much trouble... unless I'm sleeping on private property because I LIVE OUTSIDE!!! My bestfriend is my dog Connor he's the coolest, and pretty much the only one that can keep up with me.
For those of you that dont know what to think about my lifestyle or for those who do think that my lifestyle is dumb or dangerous please rethink... I live one of the most free lives you could possibly imagine. And its far more enjoyable than 4 to 8 years at a University... I think... then again I've never spent too much time at a university... but I have met a lot of student who are just asshole zombies... or just robot zombies... just following the systematic "norm".... go to school... get a job... have kids...
I feel sorry for those who have fell into that... before they ever even got a chance to truly live.... a chance to experience life, to experience freedom.... When we are under our parents supervision... we are attached by some kind of invisible chain that goes away when our parents decide to detach that chain ... school... job.... bills... our own children... are yet more chains we attach ourselves to, and it hinders us from doing what we want to do when we want to do it.
And many have called me selfish.... but dammit this is my life and before I start worrying about other I think I should be able to live freely to do whatever it is that I want to do. Or don't do whatever I dont want to do. I'm 22 years old I think being selfish in some way is OKAY, infact its taught me to truly love myself and to understand myself a bit more. But I must say I tend to be a very considerate person... I alway pick up after myself, and I am very careful and try to notice if I'm getting on someones nerves... I know when I'm not welcome anymore... at that time I leave... Oh and I have had many jobs while on the road... so doesnt really make sence to tell me to get a job...cause its not gonna be the same as most peoples pointless jobs... I usually work for free because it feels so great to help someone...
I really dont know where I'm going with this, but you know I'm just rambling and thank you if your reading this it means a lot to me. And I am very interested in what everyone thinks, especially old friends that I havn't heard from in a long time.... I have 383 friends here on facebook and I dont keep in touch with nearly enough... infact there are only about 10 to 20 that I can keep up with. I dont know but this is going out to everyone... I LOVE YOU
if there are any questions about anything... my travels.. or my dog... or anything... anything at all... the universe... I will do my best to answer...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In thought
by Jay Grays on Monday, March 14, 2011 at 12:42pm
My family has been the people I interact with every day, so I often tend to consider the stranger walking by me on the street, as my brother/sister. I once asked a family member if he would ever pick up a hitch hiker, and he said "no way." I was very disappointed in his answer, because you see, I have spent a lot of time out hitch hiking and it really gets to you when all day all everyone does is pass you up without even looking at you, like your not even there. It's my understanding (from experience) that hitch hiking and picking up hitch hikers is an okay thing to do, its not any more dangerous than stepping out your front door, hell its much safer than locking yourself in.
Many may only consider blood relation to be family. And that over anyone or anything else "blood" comes first. Well I'll tell you something we all bleed red, and anyone who bleeds is my family.
Many people would like to help others, and that is an amazing attribute, truly human. But I think we must understand that when we put out that vibe, that i am a helping person, we cannot choose who we help. Those people are just put in front of us and we must act. Sometimes your in a position where helping out is simple and outlined, but other times we have to feel it out. There were a lot of cases where I thought I was helping and in turn they had helped me. There are no coincidences in life, everything happens for a reason, and often hitch hikers have some worldly sense and knowledge that someone who lives inside most of the time rarely contains.
Open your heart and let go of fear and doubt, you create the world around you, you've built your dreams and now live them, i love you. Understand the nature of truth.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
More thoughts...(ideals)
by Jay Grays on Wednesday, March 16, 2011 at 11:26am
So as all of you should know I am a traveler. I have pretty much been all over this country. I've seen a lot and have had many amazing experiences, that have helped me grow as an individual. I have often been told that I am idealistic with my thoughts of how I want the world to be. Well here are some of my Ideals.
Freedom... absolute, true freedom for all. I suppose it would have to start with inner freedom. It can be difficult sometimes to find inner freedom, when there are many trying to sway you. Be like this or be like that, be yourself and be okay with who and where you are. I think inner-freedom has a lot to do with be content. I believe I had found some inner-freedom through understanding that no matter what or where I am, I am on my path. And my path is a righteous one, where I shall meet wonderful people and learn wonderful lessons. Achieving inner-freedom also has to do with letting go of fear. You create this reality, be not in fear but in faith that those things you don't want to happen, WONT happen as long as they don't need to (sometimes things we didn't want to happen, happen because we needed to learn from it). Find your inner-freedom.
Freedom still... Now I want to talk a little more about the freedoms that I think we should be entitled to as humans. How about the freedom to live off the land without having to be part of a society. I think that that is the biggest one for me. Because I desire to have my own land, the problem is... land is not free anymore, its all owned or being used by other humans, that often don't think to highly of a person like me(homeless, non-tax payer).
The good news is that we do have the freedom to choose to do whatever the hell we please. no one can ever take that away from you. Now often choices can be hindered by our environment, but within a means you may choose whatever. Choose to share, or choose to steal. Choose to live free, or to chain yourself inside of a box.
I would like to say some things about civilization but I am concerned slightly of who might read it. You see my ideals are not exactly society friendly, and if the wrong person read, what I want to write out next, well I could be pointed out as something that they could imprison me for... I think I will end here... there will be more later I suppose, until then... I LOVE YOU
Freedom... absolute, true freedom for all. I suppose it would have to start with inner freedom. It can be difficult sometimes to find inner freedom, when there are many trying to sway you. Be like this or be like that, be yourself and be okay with who and where you are. I think inner-freedom has a lot to do with be content. I believe I had found some inner-freedom through understanding that no matter what or where I am, I am on my path. And my path is a righteous one, where I shall meet wonderful people and learn wonderful lessons. Achieving inner-freedom also has to do with letting go of fear. You create this reality, be not in fear but in faith that those things you don't want to happen, WONT happen as long as they don't need to (sometimes things we didn't want to happen, happen because we needed to learn from it). Find your inner-freedom.
Freedom still... Now I want to talk a little more about the freedoms that I think we should be entitled to as humans. How about the freedom to live off the land without having to be part of a society. I think that that is the biggest one for me. Because I desire to have my own land, the problem is... land is not free anymore, its all owned or being used by other humans, that often don't think to highly of a person like me(homeless, non-tax payer).
The good news is that we do have the freedom to choose to do whatever the hell we please. no one can ever take that away from you. Now often choices can be hindered by our environment, but within a means you may choose whatever. Choose to share, or choose to steal. Choose to live free, or to chain yourself inside of a box.
I would like to say some things about civilization but I am concerned slightly of who might read it. You see my ideals are not exactly society friendly, and if the wrong person read, what I want to write out next, well I could be pointed out as something that they could imprison me for... I think I will end here... there will be more later I suppose, until then... I LOVE YOU
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